I've been thinking about the best way to chronicle my journey to motherhood and a blog seems to be as good a way as any. No, I'm not pregnant yet. Yes, I am single. I'm also 40, a professional and a mother at heart. Let's just say that it's the only job I've ever really wanted . . . to be a mom. It seems to me that motherhood is the greatest gift and highest honor a woman can have. Why do I feel certain that feminists everywhere just ground their teeth at that comment? Well I have an education, three degrees, and professional career that I love but at the end of the day if I just go home to an empty house and an empty heart, what's the purpose? What is my purpose?
Jeremiah 1:5 says: "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations." I would say to my future baby, I've always wanted you; I've always loved you; I've always known your name; and I've always carried you in my heart. I know it's sappy but the decision to pursue single motherhood at age 40 was a hard decision. It came after more than five years of thought and prayer and waiting. Waiting for something. . . the right time, the right man, the right circumstances. But I've come to the realization that if I want this, and I do, then I have to reach out and grab it. It won't be easy and I am scared but I'm also at peace about this decision. I hope you will join me on this journey and not judge me too harshly for my choices.
Congratulations! It's a tough decision and a long road but the rewards make everything worth it.
ReplyDelete"...and not judge me too harshly for my choices" I really have run into any negativity and have been greeted with encouragement from people I never would have expected.